What's Important

Today is cracking me up. This morning I was fine then I was convinced my world was ending for about an hour when my head was throbbing and I could barely move. But as the day has gone on I have been more productive. I got my renter's insurance (which I have to have by Friday, way to put it off! lol), I'm ordering my textbooks, making a to do list for before school starts, and car shopping.

As far as I'm concerned, this has been an up and down day but I am cherishing the up moments a lot! My mom is going to let me borrow her car tomorrow AND Friday so I can go to the doctor and go see my new apartment!! :)

I haven't seen my apartment yet, I know it is old and going to be out dated but I'm just excited to make the first step for school. The wait has been scary and unnerving at times but when I really think about it, I'm really excited. I'm not a quitter, I am strong and confident. Everyone has their moments and sure I've had a fair share of my own, but here I am taking this challenge head on.

Recently I've had a reminder of what is important and that worrying adds nothing to my life...

My friend Austen who was diagnosed with Stage 4 Non-Hodgkins Lymphoma around the same time I was dealing with my first bout of concussions in college, has the best attitude about life. I am going to begin to strive to be like her. To appreciate what I have, the time I am here and to inspire others along the way.

This past week she was taken off life support and now her family and friends are on her time until she becomes our heavenly angel. During her time here she lit a spark in everyone she met. She always had a smile on her face, a funny story or joke to tell and an encouraging word when it was needed.

During my junior year at Miami when I was finally a starter, I was on an aspiring regimen and developed an ulcer. At first we thought I might have mono so I had to go to the ER the morning of the day we were leaving to go play Virginia Tech.

Once the doctors confirmed it wasn't my spleen, I was released and my coaches had arranged for me to fly out later that night so I could meet the team. When we travelled we only took a certain amount of people and luckily for me Austen wasn't coming this time.

Not only did she stay by my side in the hospital almost all day without being asked to, she skipped her classes and made sure to get me to the airport on time for my flight. Her and I were teammates before but that's when we really became friends.

She's so incredible and such an example of selflessness. I couldn't believe she was doing all of that for me and I'm not sure I ever really expressed my gratitude to her for being there when I needed someone, no questions asked and expecting nothing in return.

When I was dealing with my concussions and she was diagnosed with cancer, we used to joke about how I couldn't play my senior year because of my injury but she was out there after her chemo treatments were done. What was wrong with me? lol, she always made me laugh and would make me feel completely valid about how I was feeling sad, pissed off and isolated.

I expressed to her that I was frustrated I was complaining and she had cancer. She would tell me that what was going on with her didn't minimize what I was going through. We were both fighting our own battles.

Today, I'm remembering her smile, her laugh, her carefree spirit, her courage, her strength and her perseverance. Cancer may have won this battle but Austen will be in eternity as our guardian angel. When days are tough and I'm feeling down I hope I can be as strong as she has always been.

Austen, thank you isn't enough but it is all that I have. Thank you for the memories, thank you for being so loving and caring. Your strength and courage mirror your radiant beauty we all were undeservingly graced with. Though our time with you was limited, you will continue to touch lives reaching beyond anything we can imagine. The way you carried yourself and lived your life serves as the best reminder of what is important. You were a prime example of true love, joy, happiness, care, empathy and selflessness. You remind us all what is most important. Austen, you will forever live in my heart serving as a constant reminder of how precious life is and how one person can impact so many people in such a short time. When your body is finally at peace, we will rejoice for the heavens will have an angel back home. Thank you, I love you so much and I can't wait to see you again someday.